Oh man, have I dropped off the side of the planet or what? the thing is, I really do have so much to say! actually saying it, however, or having the time to say it, or actually having the words come to me when i DO have time is another matter. rosebud is growing up fast. she crawls like a champ, and you have to watch her all the time! she loves to eat. she loves to get her 'little grabbers' in gucky, gooky cat food and baby poop, for what it's worth. LOTS of baths happen over here. and speaking of baths, well, she used to love them and kind of still does, but instead of splashing around in the tub with giggles galore she always, always wants to stand up. so she does.
i guess we're asking for those sticky bathtub things for christmas? because inevitably, due to the slippery bathtub, she falls. usually right on her rump, which works out well for all parties involved, but occasionally she hits her head (not hard! i'm right there to catch her as she falls!). my little girl, growing up so fast!
they all say that it would happen quickly, that time would slip away so fast, but i didn't expect it to be like this! I remember thinking that once she could crawl, and i mean REALLY crawl, she would settle down for awhile and be satisfied. for our little one, this isn't so. once, so frustrated at not knowing how to crawl, she now wishes she could walk! she lets go for seconds at a time and we watch her face change: curiosity, bewilderment, excitement, shock and then sometimes, fear. sometimes, back on the safety of her little big bum, she cries, other times she gives us a smile a mile wide.
what can i do for you, my little one? how can i teach you best?
we all read the books, we all make the speculations and we all do our best and wonder what, how and why we're doing you wrong. rosebud, when i wish on a star tonight, and i do, i wish for you. but i also wish for myself.
i wish that somehow, without fail, i can teach you. i wish that i can assist you in being a better woman than i am: stronger, smarter, more determined. i wish for you now, little bud. please, let me help you be the best that you can be.
i love you.