Wednesday, January 25, 2012

a video tribute

I found this article when Michelle from early mama posted it on the early mama facebook page. I have to say, it is so, so touching I really DID have to reach for the kleenex. It also just blows my mind to think that I will soon be a mother myself, and I just hope that my child will love me as much as these two boys love their mom.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

one single regret.

I'm really enjoying my pregnancy right now and so super excited to meet this little person i've been incubating, there is just one thing that has been making me a little remorseful as of late: I miss my waist.

Monday, January 23, 2012

sweets.

I can't stop baking and eating oatmeal cookies. sometimes with chocolate chips and/or walnuts, sometimes without.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

lucky 11, the second

okay loyal followers, now for eleven random tidbits about myself and my life. brace yourself for some real fun!

1- When I was in grade six I had a Danish pen pal by the name of Iben Onsberg. I have unsuccesfully tried to find her on facebook. She sent me wonderful gifts including these diamond shaped salted black licorice candies unlike anything produced in Canada that I still love today.

2- I have never been to a country outside the US and canada! I believe this to be a shame. Thanks to his performance in touring bands, B. has been to many european countries, so I consider myself cultured only by association.

3- When I was in high school I wanted to become either a writer or an independent fashion designer. I then realized I wasn't all that good of a writer but I'm still not sure what happened to all that gumption I had to be a fashion designer. I guess I'm not all that trendy, either, but I love to sew (something I do rarely these days, much to my dismay.)

4- I moved to Montreal to be with B. when I was 19 after dating him for 5 weeks and then being away from him for four months. I'm pretty much a hopeless romantic.

5- I am a base brat. My dad was in the military until I was 18 and my family lived in PMQs (private military quarters, i believe) until I was almost 13. I'm not sure what this says about me really, but I'm sure it has both positive and negative ramifications on my life.

6- The summer before I turned eight, I gave the queen flowers. She was wearing a turquoise dress with white polka dots. My mom is really into royalty so I knew it was a pretty big deal for the queen to be visiting Victoria (where we lived at the time) for the 1994 Commonwealth games. I took about six pictures of her before finally being dragged away by security.

7- When I was fifteen I was in a community theatre production of Les Miserables. It was wonderful. I did a lot of theatre in my early teen years and I really wish i had stuck with it a little more.

8- B. and I have two cats, the older one Halo (short for halloween) has been with us for about 6 years and Juno (short for jupiter) came to us only this past summer. I can't imagine any home of mine without a little animal in it.

9- My favourite music is soul. Otis Redding, the Falcons, Sam Cooke, Percy Sledge, Wilson Pickett and Robert Ward are my go-tos for music that makes my soul melt like butter.

10- I collect kitchy things, and have a small collection of things I call 'pervy kitch.' It includes two light switches like this one, which I got from my grandparent's house when they died. I love them.

11- Sometimes, I kinda miss high school.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

MY body

As a pregnant woman I have been forewarned about the possibility of people neglecting to respect common courtesy surrounding personal space when it comes to my belly. Over all, people have been really courteous about respecting my space and most people even ask my permission before reaching out and stroking my little pregnant stomach. To all those people and people who generally fit into this category with regard to pregnant women - thank you. There have been, however, some pretty rude people who think that just because I'm pregnant, they have a right to aggressively approach me and start rubbing my stomach. This makes me exceedingly uncomfortable and for the most part I have tried to avoid these people. I would like to make it abundantly clear that there is a major difference between reaching your hand out hesitantly for a quick little pat when we've already been conversing for a few minutes and basically rushing into me, squeezing my belly and obnoxiously cooing at it without even making eye contact with me. I would also like to say that for every one person who behaves in the way of the latter there are probably about a dozen people who fit much more firmly into the former category. Today after class when I was chatting with my friends, one of whom touched my baby bump in a very respectful way and was welcome to do so, I was approached by a classmate who, without saying a word, reached over and poked my breast. I was too shocked to say a word, but I'm sure my look said it all. The classmate was female, but I don't feel that the gender of a person who BLATANTLY disrespects what are pretty common and well known personal boundaries is of little to no consequence. I am completely infuriated. My assumption is that she was impressed by or curious about them because, quite frankly, they are pretty darn huge right now. I was also wearing a dress that was pretty low cut (although not scandalously so,) although I believe that, as with gender, what i was wearing has little bearing over what is deemed inappropriate in regards to touching somebody else's body.

Despite the fact that I am carrying a child, my body is wholly mine. I reserve the right to all agency over my body. When even my mother makes sure that I am comfortable with her touching my belly, I don't think it is asking too much that others pay me (and my little one) the same courtesy and respect.

I know that most people wouldn't even fathom breaching another persons personal boundaries in this way, but I am truly upset about this experience and I think it is important for people to be aware of how this type of activity makes a person feel.

Thanks for reading!

Monday, January 16, 2012

baby photos - because i wanted to.

I'm already late posting those 11 random things about me, but I just had to share with y'all this little picture of my hubby as a country bumpkin of 11 months old. Already a musician in the making! Is this what our baby will look like?
or more like this? (me at maybe a year and a half... i think?)

Saturday, January 14, 2012

lucky 11

Courtney tagged me in her Friday post, encouraging me to pass on this little questionaire. I thought I would go along with it, but I'm not going to tag anybody else on this one. For one thing, I just don't really have anybody else to ass it along to right about now. She also added some lovely little pictures to make hers more interesting which I would love to do but, well, my camera battery is dead and I left the charger on Vancouver Island. Hopefully it will return to me soon, so I can add a little colour to my wee blog! 1. What's your favorite zoo animal? I would probably say a giraffe, though I have never been able to see one in real life. When my family spent a week in Hawaii while I was in the fourth grade, we went to the zoo two or three times just to see the giraffes, but mama giraffe had just given birth and that exhibit was closed to the public- I was crushed. 2. Baby Sitter's Club or Sweet Valley Twins? I was very much a Baby Sitters Club girl. I even owned the board game! Besides, my mom wouldn't let me read sweet valley high books, she said they were too racy. I think that's why I wanted to read them! 3. What's the worst gift you've ever been given? Oh jeeze. I can't think of anything for this one! I guess I've never had a gift bad enough to stick out in my mind. 4. Floral or polka dots? I love floral but in my deepest heart of hearts I am absolutely, undeniably a polka-dots girl. 5. What's your No. 1 guilty pleasure song? "Halo" by Beyonce and pretty much every song that was on the top forty charts from 1996-2000. Listening to music from that period reminds me so much of the anticipation and angst of being a pre-teen and I just love it for some torturous reason. That is the music I listen to when I'm cleaning the house and B. isn't home. 6. Can you cook? Sure can! Although I have to say, for whatever reason, this pregnancy has taken away my desire to cook for the most part. There have been a lot of grilled cheese and tomato soup days and nights for the two (three) of us. 7. Have you ever done karaoke? I absolutely love karaoke, I get such a gas out of it. I was planning a huge karaoke party awhile back where me and many of my friends were going to go and let it all loose. and then I took a pregnancy test. and it was positive. I called everybody and told them I had strep throat and that I wouldn't be able to make it because oh my god, I was pregnant! 8. What's one country you would like to visit? I would love to go to Berlin! I have wanted to since high school and almost did go, but I was too lazy to apply for my passport and so I decided to take a trip to Montreal instead... look where that got me! 9. Heels or flats? I love heels, they make my legs look so long and add a little swing to my step, but I'm going to have to go with flats, because nothing beats being absolutely mobile! This also may have to do with the fact that I'm a pretty tall girl already, nt to mention a couple of inches taller than my dear hubby. 10. Do you have Bieber Fever? Not a chance. I can't stand the guy, although I do think Selena Gomez is quite the looker. I hope she cuts him off and moves on to greener pastures soon! 11. Coke or Pepsi? Canada Dry ginger ale is about the only soda pop I indulge in, so I'll go with that. The second part of this challenge is to tell you eleven random things about me, but you'll have to wait until tommorrow for that. Goodnight, all!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

getting good at life

I'm not, by nature, a very good housekeeper. My "life's too short" attitude has pretty much ensured that there are always dirty dishes in my sink, dirty clothes in my hamper (not to mention on my floor) and dust-bunnies in the corners of my kitchen, living room and bedroom. Sometimes this doesn't bother me, but even in my best moments, I wouldn't refer to it as a particular point of pride. When I feel self conscious about it, i usually shrug it off and tell myself that people who love me and know me know that I am a bit messy around the edges, but that is just a part of me that should be accepted and loved as it is. Often in life, I am juggling being a good student, hard worker, reliable friend and a supportive wife, and despite all of that, I am always sure to make sure I have a little 'me' time. When I am home I simply refuse to spend my valuable time scrubbing the bathtub or shining the light fixtures when I could be kicked back watching a great movie or reading a favourite book with a beer in hand (or sleeping in, I just loooove sleeping in. and late!) Being pregnant has put me into a bit of a panic, from time to time. i few of my first trimester hormone surges found me on my knees, broom in hand, crying about "how could I be a good mother when I can't even keep my apartment clean!?" Thus, my subconscious new years resolution has been to get better at life. I am proud to say that all my dishes are clean and there are no dust bunnies on my floors! I have also been waking up early. At just about ten every day (early for me!) I have been bouncing out of bed and feeding myself a good breakfast, ensuring a good start to my day. It feels good! I'm still giving myself a healthy dose of me time- something I anticipate I won't get much of in a few months time- but I'm also just kind of getting better at life. I almost didn't want to write this post for fear of jinxing things. It is still only January 12th and I do have three courses on the go, a husband, a handful of good friends and a job that all require something of me. My housework skills do still have a ways to go, my pantry is disorganized and I have a couple of disgruntled looking houseplants. But here's to a good start at just keeping things together. I just hope I can maintain it as the third trimester fatigue kicks in and my course load truly kicks in. Wish me luck! Also, funny tidbit from today: me, looking in the mirror, "oh, my skin looks great today! what a wonderful surprise!" (my face has been breaking out like crazy since pretty much day 1 of this pregnancy) ten seconds later "...oh yeah, that's probably because of all that make-up I put on this morning..."

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

oh baby love.

Today was a very, very exciting day in our household. Here's why!
one itty bitty foot.



just loom at that face!

We asked to not know the gender, but B. thinks he got a few flashes and he seems to think IT'S A GIRL!
We'll just have to wait and see!

Monday, January 9, 2012

congrats Jay Z and Beyonce!

gaaah. obviously I love this. One man's love letter to his new daughter.



I can't wait to see and hear what kind of songs B. will write for our new daughter or son. <3

oh, and thanks to snapme.ca for posting this first!

only in dreams

all of my intense dreams from the first trimester are back with a vengeance.

Last night, all I dreamt about were ultrasounds and baby names. It wasn't altogether a good dream, but it wasn't altogether a bad dream, either. During my ultrasound, which was incidentally conducted by an odd-ball friend of B.'s, it was found that the baby had problems with it's eyes. Specifically, it would be colour blind and have blind spots. The ultrasound technician didn't tell us the gender of our baby, but it was implied that it was going to be a boy, and in my dream, B. and I finally agreed on the name Toby, after which I kind of changed my mind and wished that I had pushed harder for Jack. I guess even in dreams, it's still my favourite boy name.

So, as my dream may reveal, B. and I are going (about 6 weeks late) for our 18-20 week ultrasound. I am nervous and excited and just hoping with all my heart that everything goes as planned. All I know is baby keeps kicking around in there, so that's a good sign.

Each day that passes is one day closer to having our own little babe about in the world and it is unbelievable. I've still got so much to do!

Friday, January 6, 2012

baby names! part 1.

I'm fairly convinced that this baby is going to be a boy, but none-the-less B. and I are happy to leave the gender as a surprise for the birthday and have been having fun (for the most part) picking both girl's and boy's names. Here are some girls names I love! This is my list, not ours, so some of these names have or will be vetoed, but this is just a general list of names that tickle me right now- subject to change, of course.

- ada
- adele
- adeline
- amelia
- april
- audrey
- ava
- belle
- beatrice (bea)
- charlotte
- clementine
- eleanor
- elizabeth
- ella
- grace
- isabel
- juniper
- sidney

Most of them start with vowels because for whatever reason, I just find they flow nicely with B.'s last name. My number one pick for a middle name right now is grace. I find it flows nicely with a lot of different types of names and I also just think it is such a sweet name for a wee girl. If only picking boy names was so easy!
if you have any comments, constructive criticism or suggestions, shoot them my way. We can use all the ideas we can get!

Thursday, January 5, 2012

an honest post

I desperately wish the baby next door would stop crying. She is about a year old, and screams and cries intermittently throughout the day on most days. Whenever she starts to cry, my blood curdles and I get so so afraid of what B. and I may be in for. Is this what it will be like for us?

does this mean I am a bad person? Does this mean I will be a bad mother?

I have three and a half months to go and every day I am more excited - and more terrified.

Any advice or perspective?